What Valentine’s Day Means to Me?

Okay so this year Valentine’s Day came and went but something rather odd happened the day before.

I play videogames online. You all know about that since I wrote about my favorite game. Anyways one of the guys I play with asked me to be his Valentine. I am not sure if he understood the meaning of the word, but I said yes. Just to give some more information. Valentine means you spoil someone for a day. They don’t have to be your significant other. Well I decided it was cute and moved on. The day before Valentine’s Day he told me he liked me. Well, there are many issues with that but this is where the story ends. I told him the truth and let him stew for a while. I am not into younger guys and long distance is not my thing either.

A little background to the story: This guy is 22 years old and lives 2 states north of me. This would not work out for 2 very important reasons. First, I am 29 nearly 30 and I would never date a guy 8 years younger than me. The second thing is that long distance rarely works out. In addition to all of this, I believe in some form of education or at least a really good job to support a family. I rarely see any guys really work at this part of their lives. That is a third reason not to date someone.

Basically, I have my preferences like anyone else. I also do not like leading people on and I do not believe that age is nothing but a number. My range is between 2 years younger and up to 5 years older. Otherwise it’s creepy and the generation gap is intense. I prefer having someone nearby to hang out with and talk regularly. I have seen several friends torn up by long distance and it did not end up working out. So my conclusion is that it’s probably not worth taking the risk unless I really like the person and we would be seeing each other regularly each month but with everyone’s busy schedule, it is really hard to travel a few states over to visit.

So anyways, my philosophy about Valentine’s Day goes like this. Love everyday not just one day a year and spoil someone at some point, just because you can. Do not lead anyone on when it comes to the affairs of the heart. Also make sure you know the definition of a Valentine so you don’t get your heart broken on the most heart filled day of the year.

Melody

How I Found My Favorite Video Game

My online friend Ryan Cooper asked me to write about a topic that we both have in common. Videogames. Ryan wanted to know how I found my favorite videogame Creativerse.

I had just gotten a Steam account in October of 2015. Then I downloaded some of the free games. I played when I could for the first 4 of 5 months. Summer of 2016, I went looking for Minecraft type games (I am not a fan of Minecraft and I could not get it to work). All of my searches came up with games that cost money. On Steam, there were two free games that looked promising.

Unturned and Creativerse. I downloaded Unturned in January of 2016. At first it was really fun, but then something awful happened. Over the summer I began making a base high up in the sky. I even got an admin to help me out. One day I was putting away supplies and three players began looting the server. They somehow found my base, built a ladder up to where I was and surrounded me. One of them threw a grenade at my feet and it blew up the floor below me, sending me to my death. I did alert the server owners but it was too alte to spend time gathering more material. So I left that game for a while. I do go in every now and then to mess around in the singe player server but the zombies are way over-powered. I get bored when I die over and over.

Four Months later I downloaded Creativerse. I immediately fell in love with it. The grind was not too bad and there was always something to explore. The grassy overworld with multiple biomes, caves in the stalagtite layer, the firely lava zone, and finally the dreaded corruption zone. Don't be fooled by the beautiful purple hue of the lowest zone. A dangerous Thing lives down there. All in all, there are many items to unlock and some you find by exploring or special events. With every update there is always something new to keep you excited and interested. There is a Pro DLC (which costs money) and an in-game store where you can purchase coins to spend on various bundles. For every major holiday there are events and new items and blocks to aquire. Right now there is a Halloween event where you have to battle for candy that you give to the Halloween Miru in exchange for beautiful chests that contain various Halloween items. This years theme is Day of the Dead. I absolutely love it!

I need to go get ready for the next event!

-Melody

Manipulation: A story

I have just faced manipulation for the first time in my life. Most of the time I only heard about it happening to other people. Thankfully I am strong enough that it does not effect me. I stand by what I believe is right. Let me tell you a story that might help someone in a similar situation. No names shall be used here.

Let me start from the beginning. I am on a dating site. I know what you are thinking. This is a breeding ground for those kinds of people. Well I put in place a strict screening process. Most of the time I block guys that are completely not a match at all. Abs and indecent exposure runs rampant but I made the filters screen out those guys too. Sadly a manipulator got through my screening process. I did go to meet him.

I met up with him at a board game convention (this detail is very important). It was really nice to finally re-connect with my old friends from the board gaming community. The fact that I had a date with one was really awesome. I had a great time. The first thing that really annoyed me was that he used sarcasm in every sentence. He embarrassed me in front of my friends by calling attention to my flaws. I laughed it off as best I could. At that point I was debating about coming back the next night after work.

The next night there were more events at the convention so I asked him if he wanted me to come back. He texted me, "Sure I guess" Then proceeded to ask me if we were going to start dating. (I have only been out with him once! Whats the rush?). I explained that I did not want to lead him on at all but I did not want to rush into anything and I would just rather be friends. I had my reasons for not wanting to date him. That was my choice, not to be taken personally. Well he was naturally very frustrated that I had said I would not date him because he is not a believer, among other things.

Later that night we talked until 3am. We went over a ton of topics. I came to figure out that we disagree on just about everything else including religion and politics. I told him that even if I were to put religion aside, we do not have anything else in common, except board games. I ended the conversation because it was late and my dad was really worried for my safety. He walked me to my car. He tried to hug me multiple times and I kept pushing away. He hugged me again and then kissed me. It was late and I was tired but I knew this felt very wrong. He texted me the next day. I said the kiss was awkward and my answer was no. I will not date him. He replied. "It was awkward because you did not kiss me back"

A few days pass and he texted me just to say hi and then I did not hear from him for weeks.

Last night I got some texts from him. He asked how I was. Then he asked if I had any luck on the dating site. I said I did not want to talk about it. He said, "About what?" It was obvious what I was referring to but I elaborated saying that I had messaged a few guys that were excellent matches but no meet ups yet. We talked about a few board games we learned and then suddenly he said this. "I don't know why I even texted you. You used me. " I asked how and he said that I used him to meet up with other gamers. I said I already knew those people and that he should leave me alone. He said, "I'm trying"

During this whole time he would use phases like, "You don't even like me so why are you talking to me." To me this was my red flag. At first everything seems great and fun. But then paranoia sets in. Manipulation is so hard to spot sometimes. With the above phrase he could make some girl feel bad for rejecting him and start dating him but then dump him. Sometimes I am afraid that if I go to the next board game convention that he might try to hurt me. I have a contingency plan for that when the time comes.

I do not want someone to hurt me because they got rejected. I think I escaped this just in time. I plan to block his number from contacting me. I should not have to live in fear because I rejected someone.

My philosophy is that if you get knocked down, you get back up again and move on to something else. Something better.

Fluteplayer777 out!

Insomnia: Not the Videogame

Hey guys! Blog time.

For the second night in a row, I am up until nearly 2am. I have no idea why but this happens sometimes. Also I have not written a blog in a really long time.

So here goes. My mind is inundated with thoughts everyday. So much sits on my mind. Sometimes I bury it in the back of my mind.

I am hoping that my temp position will become permanent. I love my job. My friend texted me after my internal interview and said that I deserve certainty in my life. God, that is an understatement. My life has always been unstable and uncertain. Its upsetting sometimes but I would like to think that I have enough trust in God that everything will work out somehow. 

Another common topic floating in my mind is my music and Youtube. I just started a new project. I am going to learn 38 new pieces of music between now and next years audition in August. I am hoping that studying some French composers might help me develop more skill and control over my musical ability.

Have you ever heard of the story of the two farmers?

There was a drought in the land and both of them desperately needed rain. Both of them prayed for rain. But only one prepared his fields to receive it.

Which one trusted God more?
The one that prepared his fields.

God will bring the rain when He's ready. You must prepare your fields to receive it.

Fluteplayer777 out!

*rumble* the business of the stomach is directly correlated to money....

I'm not talking about the thunder. I'm talking about my stomach. Until today I didn't know what it was like to go hungry for a day and not know where your next gas money will come from. We live in such uncertain times. I never thought I would be hit so hard. Work is scarce even if you have a job.

Here I am writing about a feeling that some people have every day. Who am I to talk if others are in a worse place. As the saying goes. If you think things are bad in your life its always worse for someone else. I don't remember who said it or the exact wording but I think you get the picture.

I hate that feeling in the pit of your stomach. Growling and rumbling away as it churns at your breakfast and prepares for your lunch. But what if you didn't have breakfast or lunch. Then your stomach lets out a loud growl like a lion that hasn't had prey in days or a bear that just woke from its slumber.

In any case, I have a potential money bucket coming my way. Soon I hope. But for me work is more than the money. I have discovered that one of my many missions in life is to make sure that customer service is at its best. I have observed at many stores and restaurants that the people that were hired to serve feel like they can talk to their clients-I prefer the term guests-in any way they please. Thus they loose business really quickly.

Losing business is like being hungry. You have so much you wish to give but no one to give it to. Thus so much food you would like to taste and no money to buy it.